IN A LIGHTER MOOD (LAUGH ALL THE WAY!!!!)

IN A LIGHTER MOOD !!!!
 (1)An old woman boarded a bus from Lagos to Calabar and  told the driver "Driver please when we reach Benin tell me o." The driver nodded and then she shouted again, in pidgin English "My children,una hear wetin I tell  am?"
 Everybody responded "Yes, mama".
       On the long journey to Lagos, everybody slept off and forgot about Mama's request. After several hours of driving and then close to Lagos, with Benin about four hours behind, the old woman asked "Driver you never reach benin  since ?" ooooh! the driver exclaimed "Mama benin is like four hours behind us ".
  "Ah!",the woman shouted and started crying, saying "Take me back to Benin, a beg, I no want wan wahala o". Considering the  age of the woman, the passengers agreed that the driver should turn back to benin.
   On getting to Benin , the driver came down ,and opened the door and told the woman she was in Benin. The woman simply opened her hand bag , brought out two tablets of panadol and swallowed them with water. She then smiled and said :
 "Thank you my son.Na my daughter say  when I reach benin, make I drink two tablets of panadol.
"I don take am now, Oya make we dey go lagos...."


(2) An Irish asked a Nigerian "do you have Jews in your country? The Nigerian replied "of course we have Jews, We have orange Jews, Grape Jews, Lemon Jews and Apple Jews.


(3)INVENTION COMPETITION: A group of scientists organized a competition to test the intelligence of the Nigerian students in inventing things. In the end, 3 students qualified for the  final.
   On the day of the final, they were called out  from the crowd to come and present to the Judges and the audience what they had invented. The  first student was Yomi Ade from lagos , he  said " I invented a biro that can write clearly what people are saying on paper ". He practiced it and it worked and was applauded. The 2nd student came out and said;" I am Amarachi Ngwa  from Aba I invented a chip that can tell the amount of money on anybody close to it" . She demonstrated how it is being used  and it worked and  was applauded. The 3rd student came out and said  " I am Musa Audu  from Maiduguri .I  invented an explosive that can shatter the human body into a million pieces, penetrating the hardest of bones . Can you allow me to sit down while I demonstrate to you how it works". The chief scientist stood up and said;" don't bother to demonstrate it for us,you are the winner of this competition".